Part 5..what boys experience during this phase
Natures solution to controlling musth is clear.. start slowly and ease them into this stage over a number of years, where they’ll have a chance to learn to control it in properly structured populations where the older bulls suppress, both physically and socially, the younger bulls’ musth condition. The precocious young bulls were simply not be able to cope with the early and extended flood of hormones.
Our boys have need of older men who have been through the “testosterone stage” to tell them that its allright, that what they are experiencing is normal and that they don’t have to feel guilty, but to understand that they have to be kept reigned in. They need to know that because of the huge testosterone surge(a 400% increase during puberty to turn them into men), they are not in their normal framework of thinking and so need strict boundaries put in place for them. Boys that learn the benefit of boundaries at this stage of their lives will be set for life, those that are allowed to flit in and out of romantic relationships without any boundaries, will have a very difficult time controlling their urges later in life, even within the confines of marriage.
Symptons of the Testosterone stage
- Will pull away from mom and it is very important for them to relate to dad or another male figure. Mom reassure your son that this is perfectly natural
- must do male things with dad regularly
- temper tantrums followed by peaceful behaviour
- moodiness
- pimples
- dangerous behaviour - a little more accident prone, the testosterone makes them feel as though they’re invincible
- teasing siblings horribly - need to tell the siblings to ignore them and they’ll soon get bored, they’re just looking for reaction
Part6..what Girls experience during this phase
Oh Wow, Oh Wow, the onset of a brain absolutely bathed, no emersed in a tub of estrogen and do dad and mom get to know about it. The most important thing to remember is that they're not totally in control of whats happening to them and so need a little more lee way in the area of "up and downs" than what would normally be given. Dad and Mom, this is the phase where we just cant take things too personally!!
They become "estrogen drenched", and as a result the bud will turn into a blooming flower and therefore a fully blown woman!!
There are obviously side effects to this "estrogen drenching" and those being...
- pulling away from their dad, but not feeling too good about that fact. They could be a little embarrassed about what is happening to their bodies and will need reassuring from dad that they're as gorgeous as ever, and dad needs to continue to give them love and affection. dad could feel a little awkward at this stage too.
- Every mirror in the house suddenly becomes important and their looks suddenly become a priority. A side effect of estrogen is wanting to be attractive to the opposite sex, and when their is such a flood of hormone in their bodies, that desire to attract the opposite sex is at its peak. At this stage it is vital that dad(or substitute male authority), reassure and almost "date" his girl, this will help quench the desire to prematurely get involved in relationships with the opposite sex.
- Mom and dad you need to explain to her the side effects of both testosterone in their young male friends aswell as estrogen in her body and let her know that she is not in her normal framework of thinking and needs your guidance and boundaries as a result.
- Putting a 400% testosterone induced male and an estrogen bathed brain together with unlimited supervision is asking for trouble!!
- could try and usurp moms authority, but this could be a great time of relationship building for mom and daughter. If daughter becomes cheeky, mom, try not take it too personally and realise that this phase will pass.
- they will experience mood swings, feelings of insecurity and their own feisty nature could become more subdued. Can tend to lock themselves away in their rooms.
- Crushes are very healthy and they should be encouraged to chat with you, in a fun way about those crushes.
- At this stage it is very healthy for them to have someone that they can look up to and aspire to, a little bit of mentorship. Mom if the rolemodel is healthy encourage it!!
- Teach them goal setting and strategic planning, give them healthy goals and help distract them from what is happening to their bodies at that particular time
I hope you have enjoyed this teaching as much as I enjoyed putting it together. I trust that it would truly help you see how important both the male and female are in the raising of healthy young independent offspring. We were designed to be a family. Malachi 2:15 says "Didnt I the Lord make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are his. And what does he want? Godly children from your union.